Reflection

I have found that I need a lot of time for reflection. My life now is so busy that I it is difficult to find a time that I can let my mind wander. You hear a lot about being fully engaged, but maybe we need more time to unplug and think. If so, what is the best time to do it?

Looking back, I made most of my toughest decisions alone. I need to get away and assess. I remember going camping by myself once while my family went to a birthday party without me. I had too much on my mind and needed some time to think. I had been offered a 50 week contract and bonus at my employer, who was shutting down our department, but wanted me to stay until they transitioned to a new operating model. I had to decide, do I take the contract or do I look for another job? What happens if they end the contract and the bonus is prorated down? What happens if I cannot find a job after the contract period and the bonus goes to bills? I had two kids in daycare at the time and a high cash burn because of it. I had to be alone and have a good discussion with myself. Ultimately I chose to forgo the bonus and found a new role.

I can tell you one poor time to reflect, and that is at night in bed. There is nothing worse than waking up at 1:30 AM with your mind racing, and watching the clock tick through 3:30 AM. Panic sets in as you realize you’re going to spend the day sleep deprived. However, you cannot get your mind to slow down even though you recognize you are better off well rested. You try focusing on your breath, getting comfortable and clearing your mind. Sometimes this works, sometimes it does not.

Perhaps we all need to take more time to think, to put down the phones and devices, to unplug for a bit with nothing more than a pen and a notebook and just start hashing things out with ourselves. We can ask ourselves – are we on the right path? Am I taking care of myself? Am I taking care of others? What is missing in my life? What needs to be missing in my life? Sometimes these are important questions that need to be asked, and we need to dedicate time to actually think them through.